A little showy
Recently I was chatting with a good friend and someone I worked with early in my career. She is currently in the middle of a transition and we were discussing our career paths.
From my view, she left her job quite unceremoniously. I made the suggestion that she make a LinkedIn post about her recent departure. Her tenure was long and she was instrumental in building the company and design team into what it is today.
She had been considering the idea but was putting it off. She didn't feel comfortable drawing attention to herself 'in that way'. I suggested that people care about her and would be curious to hear about the decision as well as what she was thinking about next. It could even expose her to new opportunities she wasn't considering.
She agreed that the post could be valuable but was still uncomfortable. Towards the end of the conversation she suggested that I had always thought this way. I was always 'better at putting myself out there'. I started to think about why this was the case.
My failed career
Before I was a designer, I was a musician. A major regret I have for that period of my life was the belief that I would be found or discovered for my talents. I thought if I was good enough, good things would come to me.
I was focused on the creation of art and music and I didn't feel comfortable playing the publicity game in a straightforward way. Anything I did for publicity had to also be part of the art. This meant that the publicity was often difficult to understand or even off-putting.
By the time I had decided that music would not be the career I pursue, I had become very aware of what mistakes I had made in self-promotion. I was not going to let that happen again.
The comeback is always greater than the setback
When I entered into the world of design, I decided to make public sharing part of my process. I wanted to be open and vulnerable about where I was and where I was going, even if it wasn’t cool. This ended up being really helpful for two reasons:
- I received significantly more feedback early on than if I had kept my work to myself
- People's awareness of what I was doing often resulted in new opportunities
Feedback is a painful gift
In the realm of design, when I would learn something new or complete a project I would share it. Sometimes others would provide feedback or tips of how to do something better.
This feedback loop was an accelerator in my learning as it often made me aware of aspects in my thinking I had neglected to examine.
At first, public feedback can feel really intimidating and scary. Anybody can say anything, and why should I trust them?
Once you experience enough of it, you begin to critique the feedback and decide what is valuable and what is not.
You remain in control of your vision. Over time, you can get to a place where you feel enthusiastic about feedback when it doesn't feel dangerous.
Open and connected
Through sharing I also started to meet like-minded people. People with extremely similar interests. These relationships led to friendships and also career opportunities.
Suddenly, I wasn't a generic resume or a website, I was someone who was referred for a job because someone knew me as an excited and growing designer.
These connections wouldn't have been possible if I didn't give people the opportunity to know me through sharing.
The art of sharing needs to be rooted in something real. Your learnings, your growth, or your craft are the things worth sharing because others can take something from it. They can connect what you are doing to their own experience, learn something new, or simply be inspired by what is possible.
If you find yourself trying to do something with the specific intention to share it, it is likely not going to be very effective.
Meaning
I'm sure you know someone who shares all the time and it often feels like a stretch. They want the attention so they are generating something to share. I recommend against this behavior because people see right through it and it's not useful.
I think this type of sharing behavior ends up scaring some people away from wanting to share, because people don't want to be seen this way.
I have some good news for you. If you are thinking about sharing this way, you are unlikely to ever be seen as an over-sharer. Self awareness is your greatest defense from being cringe.
Self awareness = confidence
Conversely, don't apologize for sharing things that are meaningful to you. Don't approach sharing in an overly timid way. Know why you are doing it and do it.
When you share something, pre-consider how it will be received. Craft the language and your tone. Explain what is interesting or important to you. Consider how you share it; the medium is part of the message.
I am constantly learning and refining my own thoughts from this process. As I write this document right now, I am growing and further developing how I think about sharing.
Take your time with the process of sharing. The more you consider your actions, the more confident you will be in sharing and you won't need to be tied into any specific results. You are doing it because it is a meaningful part of your work. Even if people think you are a little showy.